It's the most/ wonderful tiiiime/ of the year

Family togetherness? The joy of giving? Homemade goodies? The joy of getting? Seeing old friends? HA!

This is the day we've all been waiting for. WIRELESS INTERNET DAY!

My parents finally joined the second half of the first decade of the 21st century, and got high speed wireless internet bundled with their phone- a deal which actually saves them money. It also saves my sanity, as well as $2.35 per day for chai while using the wireless at the coffeeshop.

Before disconnecting the old dial-up, we took a historical video of it making its sweet, sweet noises. Niii, nuu, ERRR bop bop bop. ERR bop bop bop. CHCHCHCHCHCHCHCH. Someday, if the format is still playable, we'll show our children this artifact documenting the 60-second process of connecting to google, and they will be dumbfounded. (Mommy, was that when you had to go outside just to get cell phone service? Yes, honey, and this was before the internet was everywhere, you had to buy something called a wireless router to get a signal. And mommy, was this before robot slaves and jetpacks? We don't have those things now, honey. Stop reading so much sci-fi.)

So this is an historic moment: the first post from the wonderful world of wireless internet. We've already stopped talking to each other altogether, but we do send each other YouTube videos and naked photos of our high school classmates. And people say the internet is isolating.